Budding and blooming as a woman in a culture that doesn't celebrate womanhood...

By Shari Levine

Can you imagine living in a place where everyone, (including the men and boys), celebrated your first period?

This is exactly what many girls growing up in ancient times could expect. Ceremonies and rituals were planned to honor each girl's first menstrual period. Read on to discover what some Native American tribes, a tribe from Zaire, and another primitive tribe did to honor a girl's first flow.

Native American Tribes
In some Native American tribes, a girl's first period was honored with a puberty ceremony. They believed that each girl was a heavenly being and that she had incredible powers. She was isolated from the rest of the tribe, except for a few wise women who taught her about sexuality, childbearing, and marriage. When this time of isolation was over the entire tribe celebrated and honored the girl by having a huge feast in her honor.

Zaire
A girl who began to menstruate for the first time in a certain tribe in Zaire, was said to be blessed by the moon. This girl became the focus of celebration in the tribe. She went into the women's house with her female relatives and friends. Each girl was taught to be proud of herbody both sexually and in terms of its ability to bear children. She was taught the arts and crafts of motherhood, and people from all around came to pay their respects. (Can you imagine this?!)

Other Cultures
In many other cultures, menstruating women went to a menstrual hut or a moon hut, (a small building away from the rest of the village). The people believed that women have incredible powers of healing and creativity, during menstruation, and that these powers should not be wasted on everyday work. Instead of working, a menstruating woman spent her time meditating on her life.

Unfortunately, when most American girls get their first period, they feel alone, embarrassed, and often scared and confused by the messages they receive from society about what it means to be a woman.

One girl tells us...
I got my first period when I was just nine years old. It was the summer after fourth grade, and I was at overnight camp. After swimming in the lake I went back to my bunk to change. I was shocked to see a very dark blood stain on my bathing suit. I ran to the infirmary and told the nurse that I was bleeding to death. She took one look at my bathing suit and laughed. "It's just you period," she said.

At the age of nine, I had no idea what she was talking about. In our school we didn't have “sex education” class until fifth grade. Nobody ever talked to me about puberty, menstruation, or the biology of a woman's body. It felt like a cruel trick was being played on me. The nurse gave me some pads and sent me off to do arts and crafts.

It's not that Americans don't celebrate. We have lots of ceremonies to celebrate life events such as graduations, birthdays, marriages, and deaths. We even have special rituals for teenagers like sweet sixteen parties, Bat Mitzvah for Jewish girls, and Confirmation for Christian girls. But there is no positive ritual to initiate girls into womanhood.

AND the messages our culture gives girls about menstruation are often negative. For example, women will refer to getting their periods as being on the rag. This expression has a really negative feeling compared to the tribal reference to menstruation as a woman's moontime (See below). A lot of women associate their periods with feeling fat and bloated, cranky, crampy, and moody.

There is a need for the women in our culture to start new and positive rituals for menstruation. There is a need to celebrate being feminine. One woman I know celebrated her daughter's first period by taking her out for a special dinner and by talking to her about sexuality, birth control, and the intense feelings she can expect in the upcoming years. What an awesome way to be initiated into womanhood!

You don't have to rely on someone else to help you welcome your period. -- You can have a celebration that is your very own by doing something that honors the incredible thing that your body is doing. Seel below for suggestions on how to celebrate your period.

How can you become a wise woman growing up in a culture that is not very wise in the way it educates girls? -- There are lots of places where you can find good information about the changes your body and mind are going through. Start with the women around you. Your mother may be a great source of wisdom; you can gain a lot of information from her.

If your mother is not able to give you all of the wisdom that you need, there are many other sources. -- Any older woman who you can talk to can be a source of great wisdom, such as an aunt, godmother, teacher, coach, health care provider, rabbi or minister. You can take pieces of wisdom from all the women in your life.

If you are one of those lucky girls who does have wise women around her, pass along your wisdom to friends who are not as lucky. Surround yourself with as many wise women as you can to help you to take care of yourself both inside and out.

Moontime

In some cultures the menstrual cycle is called the moon cycle, and when a woman bleeds it is called her moontime. There has always been a close connection between the moon and the menstrual cycle. The moon has its own cycle as it moves around the earth growing from a sliver to a full moon. This cycle lasts 29 1/2 days. The menstrual cycle is about 28 days, very close to the moon cycle. In ancient times when people lived closely together in small villages, the women had their menstrual cycles at the same time. These cycles often matched with the phases of the moon. Women gave birth or ovulated during the full moon, and had their period during the dark phase of the moon.

Suggestions to celebrate your period.

Honor your moontime with a special ritual that celebrates your body as an instrument, not an ornament. Your ritual can be as serious or as silly as you want. Here are a few suggestions:

Create your own moonhut space where you can do what you need to do to relax and check in with yourself.

Write about how you appreciate your body each month and keep your writing in a special place.

Eat a half moon cookie.

Learn how a moon dial works.

Read about the moon's lunar cycles.

Study astronomy.

Learn about your astrological sign.

Build a moon out of papier-mache.

To keep track of her cycles, one of my friends marks the day her period begins on a calender by drawing a moon.

Suggested Reading

Flowering Woman, Moontime for Kory
by Shinan Barclay

Are You There God, It's Me Margaret
by Judy Blume

Changing Bodies Changing Lives
by Ruth Bell

Sweet Secrets: Stories of Menstruation
by Kathleen O'Grady (Editor) and
Paula Wansbrough (Editor)

Blood, Bread, and Roses: How Menstruation Created the World
by Judy Grahn

Growing Up: It's a Girl Thing: Straight Talk About First Bras, First Periods and Your Changing Body
by Mavis Jukes and Debbie Tilley (Illustrator)